The Impalers - Vampire Band

New Contest!

2008-09-24T10:22:00.000-07:00

Erin McCarthy, "One of the romance writing industry's brightest stars" (Romance Reviews Today), returns with a flat-out delightful, new, and sexy contemporary romance about a woman who's happy being single - and the man determined to change her mind. FLAT-OUT SEXY releases in November is is available for pre-order now and we're celebrating with a fun new contest giving away THREE autographed copies from her backlist!Independent single mother Tamara Briggs wanted to find a new, sexy, no-strings-attached man - just not one as young as NASCAR driver Elec Monroe. But he sure does get her heart racing. And after she's tricked into a blind date with him, Tamara gives in to her passion. Things screech to a halt, though, when he asks to meet her children. Whatever happened to wham-bam-thank-you ma'am? Suddenly Tamara has to decide how much risk she's willing to take to experience the power of true love.

For details on how to enter, head over to http://www.authorisland.com/ - A winner will be drawn on November 30th - Good luck!

Fun Contests!

2008-05-06T07:41:00.000-07:00

FALLEN officially hit the shelves last Thursday and to celebrate I'm doing a fun contest with three other authors. All you have to do is give your answer to the question below in the comments section and I'll pick a random winner from those who post on Tuesday and Wednesday. Up for grabs is a copy of FALLEN, plus an assortment of 15 paranormal romances by various authors. Then after you comment here, hop over to the other three authors blogs and answer their questions for a chance to win even more cool prizes!

Make sense? Sort of? :)

Here's the question you need to answer:
Which celebrity do you think is a vampire?

Here's what we thought...
Anya Bast- Tom Cruise. He's either a vampire or an alien.
http://www.anyabast.com/blog/

Michele Bardsley- Paris Hilton. C'mon. She's pale, doesn't eat, and only comes out at night.
http://blog.michelebardsley.net

Tate Hallaway- Of course the old joke is Dick Clark, but he's sort of dropped out of the scene (in hiding until he can rise again?) My other answer is equally obscure: Jim Davis, the creator/writer of the Garfield comic strip. I think he's a vampire because he has this magical ability to continue to be immensely popular with kids. My son Mason devours anything Garfield related. Another friend of mine said her daughter did the same thing. I think it's clearly all about vampire glamour.
http://tatehallaway.blogspot.com

Erin McCarthy- I stole this answer straight from Lori Devoti (see her interview with the Impalers a few weeks ago) but I thought it just had to be true. Oprah is clearly a vampire... no one can exert that kind of influence without the use of glamours. And she is tight with Tom Cruise after all.

So which celeb do you think is a vampire? And make sure you visit the other author's blogs for a chance at more great prizes. :-)

Erin

Diabetes Auction Basket

2008-05-02T12:37:00.000-07:00

Author Brenda Novak is running her amazing Diabetes Auction again this year during the entire month of May, and Kathy and Erin have donated a vampire basket. Visit www.brendanovak.com to bid on it.

The basket includes the following books:
Any Way You Want It
Fangs For The Memories (with sexy new mass market cover!)
My Sister Is A Werewolf
High Stakes
Bit The Jackpot
Bled Dry
Sucker Bet
An Advanced Reader Copy of First Blood, an anthology with Susan Sizemore, Erin McCarthy, Chris Marie Green, and Meljean Brook (August release)

PLUS, an Impalers CD, an Impalers t-shirt and other vampire goodies.

Help us help a great cause!
The Impalers

Lori Loves Werwolves

2008-03-25T19:26:00.000-07:00

Okay, despite this admission, we are thrilled to introduce Lori Devoti, www.loridevoti.com Nocturne author extraordinaire. (Even if she does have bad taste in preternatural creatures--wink, wink.)

Lori Devoti grew up in southern Missouri and attended college at the University of Missouri-Columbia where she earned a Bachelor of Journalism. She, however, made it clear to anyone who asked, she was not a writer; she worked for the dark side—advertising. Now twenty years later, she’s proud to declare herself a writer and visit her dark side occasionally by writing dark paranormal romances for Silhouette Nocturne.

Lori lives in Wisconsin with her husband, daughter, son, an extremely patient shepherd mix, and the world’s pushiest Siberian husky. And she's pleased to announce her newest Nocturne, Guardian's Keep...

Kol Hildr had spent the last century battling hellhounds and warlocks who sought to usurp his portal’s magic. A mighty shape-shifter with the ability to change into wolf form, Kol made accessing the powerful gateway nearly impossible–unless you were a witch of Kelly Shane’s talents. She had a score to settle and would do anything to close the portal that led to her unearthly prison. Though an alliance with her compromised Kol’s purpose, something about the little witch overwhelmed his fierce, battle-worn soul. But when he learned Kelly’s life might be in jeopardy, could Kol put aside the one thing he thought he valued most–the portal–to journey to the other side and rescue her?

Hi Lori! Thanks for joining us today. How's about answer a few questions for us.

Why do you write about vampires? (Kind of a trick question)
My first published foray into vampires will come out this December—a novella in the Holiday with a Vampire Silhouette Nocturne anthology. But I also have a couple (ahem) unpublished vampire tales lurking on my hard drive. Why write them? They are the epitome of the tortured hero…and have bad boy potential out the wazoo. Who could make a better romance hero? (except maybe a hellhound…)

If you could go on a date with a vampire, what would you do?
Besides wear a turtle neck? A moonlit dinner on top of some medieval castle’s parapets would certainly be appealing. If he was a more modern kind of guy…all night bowling?

Do you prefer long hair or short hair on your men (vampires, heroes, etc)?
Okay, I’ll admit it I like my heroes with long hair. Maybe it’s because so few men in real life can carry the look off.

What is your favorite vampire movie?
Underworld, hands down.

What is the favorite of the books you've written?
I think it actually may be Wild Hunt which won’t be out until June. It’s the story of a hellhound who is looking for a way to kill his father and winds up getting caught up with the Wild Hunt. Tortured sexy hero and some kick ass women. Gotta love that.

What celebrity do you suspect is a vampire?
Oprah. Seriously, how can woman have gotten so much power over humans in one mortal lifetime? And have you seen some of her guests? The books she makes into best-sellers? There is some serious mind-control going on there.

What food would you miss the most if you were a vampire?
Can I still have Lattes? How about salsa—that’s pretty much liquid, right? Maybe I’d just have to stalk all night Starbucks and Taco Bells…If you are what you eat and all that…

If you were an Impaler, what instrument would you play?
I played the clarinet for years, but wouldn’t even ask the undead to listen to me play that. Maybe the banjo or harmonica—I am from Southern Missouri, and a little tinge of Bluegrass might liven things up.

Vampires or werewolves? Why?
Sorry, guys, gotta go with werewolves since most of my books have either hellhounds or garm (wolf-shape-shifters) in them. Like I said, I am working on a vampire tale though for December release.

If you were a vampire, where would you sleep? Coffin? Darkened bedroom? Crypt? Or other? If other, explain.
Something surrounded with all those laser alarm beams you see in spy movies—try and stake me, will you? Boom—cage drops on you and you’re a midmorning snack.

If you weren't a writer, what would you be?
Sane?

What's the best part of being a writer?
Playing Freecell and calling it work.

What is your favorite color?
Red, isn’t it yours?

If you were a vampire, what time period would you have been made one?
I don’t know about me in particular, but the world could have used a kickass female vampire in the late 1800’s and early 1900’s. It could have put a whole new face on the women’s suffrage movement. Oh, yeah.

Who was a better vampire? Brad Pitt or Tom Cruise?
Neither is really working for me. I went to college with Brad Pitt and I can’t shake the all American image that’s left over. And Tom Cruise, you’re kidding me, right?

Well, the werewolves win, but at least we have a draw on the Pitt/Cruise debate!

Kay Stockham Picks Brad Pitt

2008-03-11T19:34:00.000-07:00

Today we're talking to Superromance author, Kay Stockham, www.kaystockham.com, who doesn't write about vampires, but clearly should. Here's what Kay had to say...

If you could go on a date with a vampire, what would you do?
Get tips on staying young. ;)

Do you prefer long hair or short hair on your men (vampires, heroes, etc)?
Hmmm.. tough call. Medium length? Enough that if I ran my fingers through the length it would curl. *shiver*

What celebrity do you suspect is a vampire?
LOL Tom Cruise (see now below). I think Katie is entranced.

What food would you miss the most if you were a vampire?
Chocolate.

If you were an Impaler, what instrument would you play?
Definitely keyboard/piano. I've always thought there was something haunting about the sound.

Where is your favorite place to go on vacation?
I love having sand beneath my feet and hearing the crash of waves against the shore. There's something so soothing about it.

If you were a vampire, where would you sleep? Coffin? Darkened bedroom? Crypt? Or other? If other, explain.
Darkened bedroom--I definitely like my creature comforts.

What's the best part of being a writer?
The best part of being a writer is being able to create new worlds. That rocks.

Of all the characters you've created, who's your favorite?
Hmmm... that's a tie. Have to be either Joe Brody (Man With A Past) or Nick Tulane (His Son's Teacher). Both have a hard shell and soft center.

What is your favorite color?
Black. See? I fit right in!

Who was a better vampire? Brad Pitt or Tom Cruise?

Brad Pitt. Tom Cruise sucks (pun intended).

That's another one for Brad... go Louis. Thanks for dropping by, Kay!

Blog Party

2008-03-10T18:17:00.000-07:00

We love a good party, and we've heard that reader Laurie is throwing a big one for Brava author, Dianne Castell, March 13-15th. If you're interested in prizes, excerpts, and sexy books, head over to http://lauries-laudanum.blogspot.com/ Thursday and Friday and chat with Dianne about her new book, HOT AND BOTHERED.

The book is set in Savannah, another great city for vampires to hang around in. Maybe it's time for an Impalers road trip...

Ren

Interview with Lori Foster

2008-02-27T04:23:00.000-08:00

The Impalers sat down with New York Times Bestselling author Lori Foster to get her thoughts on vampires, long hair, and the favorite character she's written. Hint: Look at the cover to the right.

Thanks to Lori for answering all our random questions, and here's what she had to say...

If you could go on a date with a vampire, what would you do?
[Lori Foster] I love movies, and it’s dark in theaters, so I guess that’d work. But to keep from offending anyone, I’d make it an action flick and not a horror. ;-)

Do you prefer long hair or short hair on your men (vampires, heroes, etc)?
[Lori Foster] That very much depends on the guy, but overall, I think MOST men look much, much better with shorter hair, at least on their heads. Chest hair is good. No waxing, please. It’s for sissy boys.

What is your favorite vampire movie?
[Lori Foster] Underworld, the second one, with the romance. LOVED it. But I do like the scary vampire movies too, where the vamps are bad guys, not romantic figures.

What is your favorite of all the books you’ve written?
[Lori Foster] Right now, it’s SERVANT: The Acceptance, written under my initials L. L. Foster. It won’t be out until September, but I just finished it, so it’s freshest in my mind. I love weaving a thread of romance through horror-type plotting.

Would you like to stay up all night and sleep all day? What would you miss about day-walking?
[Lori Foster] LOL. I’m a very early to bed, very early to rise kind of person. NOT a nightowl at all. But I come from a long line of nightowls, so maybe I’d be able to adjust if I had to.

What celebrity do you suspect is a vampire?
[Lori Foster] LOTS of them! Angelina Jolie, Nicole Kidman, Johnny Dep... they all seem very vampish to me.

If you were an Impaler, what instrument would you play?
[Lori Foster] Drums! My grandson is currently very into the drums. He’ll drum on anything –and somehow I always end up drumming with him. I have zip for rhythm, but as a two year old, he doesn’t mind.

How did you start writing?
[Lori Foster] I read several really wonderful books, pondered how things would have gone if the plot were different, and ending up creating my own plots. That got me going, and pretty soon I started writing them out, then typing them out. After I sold my first book, I bought a computer.

What's your favorite song?
[Lori Foster] Hmmm. Right now, it’s “Coming Undone,” by KORN. Very intense, but with a wonderful beat.

Who is your idol?
[Lori Foster] I don’t really have idols, but I very much admire our military.

Vampires or werewolves? Why?
[Lori Foster] Vampires. I like chest hair, but not back, neck, stomach, shoulder hair. The whole dog-like thing sort of creeps me out.

Where is your favorite place to go on vacation?
[Lori Foster] Anywhere near water, but preferably a big lake with a cabin in the woods, a hot tub on the back deck, and lots of nice nature trails to walk.

If you were a vampire, where would you sleep? Coffin? Darkened bedroom? Crypt? Or other? If other, explain.
[Lori Foster] Since I already sleep in a very darkened bedroom with a sound machine and a fan, I guess that’d work. I’m something of an insomniac, so I need the right setting!

If you weren't a writer, what would you be?
[Lori Foster] Either a painter, or a teacher. I love to paint, but never have enough time now, and I’ve always thought teaching was one of the most important jobs in our country.

What's the best part of being a writer?
[Lori Foster] I get to create entire worlds. I get to think about what a character should say, instead of getting caught off guard, as is the case in real life. I get to create a lot of happy endings – because I believe in happy endings.

Of all the characters you've created, who's your favorite?
[Lori Foster] My female character in my Servant series. She’s ballsy, upfront, honest, and a hero. She doesn’t have to play political games or worry about what society will think. She does the right thing, the best way she knows how. I admire her – even when she’s slashing someone to death.

What is your favorite color?
[Lori Foster] Black or bluejean. ;-) That’s what dominates my closet.

Who was a better vampire? Brad Pitt or Tom Cruise?
[Lori Foster] Brad Pitt, hands down! No matter what, he’s sexy!

Congrats to Lori for hitting #2 on the NYT with her February release, HARD TO HANDLE!

The Impalers

Ren, Drake, Johnny, Dave, Wyatt, and Vittorio (sometimes)

2008-02-22T07:03:00.000-08:00

Solange Ayre, galaxy-hopping investigative journalist, also serves as a policy advisor to the United Conglomeration of Planetary Jurisdictions. She makes her home on Ayriana, her private island-republic in the West Caribbean region of Earth.

Her novella for Ellora’s Cave, ONE THOUSAND BRIDES, details last year’s shocking abduction of Earth women by aliens.

Would you like to stay up all night and sleep all day?
Darling, how else does one LIVE? All the fun happens at night. I haven’t seen the sun in ten years!

How did you start writing?
I started writing when I realized that my career in intergalactic journalism gave me unique insights. For instance, when the Terilian aliens came to Earth last year and simultaneously kidnapped 1000 women, I was able to communicate with their ship and get the entire amazing story.

What's your favorite song?
“Because the Night” as sung by Patti Smith. Dear Bruce Springsteen wrote the song in a futile effort to woo me.

Which Impaler would you date?
Any of you, you’re all adorable! However, my heart is still given to my dear deceased husband, St. Georges Ayre, who was mysteriously assassinated by ninjas.

Vampires or werewolves?
Vampires, OF COURSE! I dated a werewolf years ago. He wanted me to wear my furs and howl at the moon! Perhaps I would have been up for that (I was a bit wild in my younger days) but the steak tartare was simply too much for me.

If you weren't a writer, what would you be?
Perhaps something incredibly boring, such as an indexer of state statutes. Oh! The mind reels at the very thought!

What's the best part of being a writer?
The near-fanatical worship from my millions of fans.

Of all the characters you've created, who's your favorite?
Delos, the alien hero of ONE THOUSAND BRIDES. I love long-haired men with good physiques. And his cat ears really bring the Sexy.

Who was a better vampire? Brad Pitt or Tom Cruise?
Brad Pitt was more convincing. Since Tom really IS a vampire, he had to be careful not to give himself away. That had an unfortunate effect on his acting.

Thanks, Solange! The Impalers think being an indexer of state statues sounds sexy. ;-)

Why Vampires Hate Valentine's Day

2008-02-14T07:42:00.000-08:00

Is there anyone dead or alive who really likes Valentine's Day? Honestly. It's a holiday just designed to lead to disappointment. Come on, you know this is true. It's one of those holidays that has all this expectation around it, but just never pans out.

Then factor in the possibility of suffering through hundreds of these days of roses and candies and flowers. And again--inevitable disappointment abounds. Why you ask?

Well, let me give you a scenario. You go out and get your love bunny a dozen roses. Good, right? Well, then February 14th comes again next year, and there will be disappointment if you don't mix it up. So you get a huge foil, heart-shaped box of chocolates for your sweetie-pants. Which is a bit of a dud gift, if you are dating another undead, but it's the thought, right? You can see a little disappointment, but you still get lucky, so okay. We'll call this one a win. Then next thing you know, yep, it's February 14th again. So you go for jewelry this time, except it's not the piece she'd had her eyes on. But how were you supposed to know she wanted the garnet earrings, not the onyx one? Okay, you could have listened. But sometimes that's hard too.

You see where I'm going here. Now do this every year for eternity.

Valentine's Day sucks.

I'm going back to my coffin now and wait for February 15th.

- Jack

Book Proceeds Go To Battered Women's Shelter

2008-02-13T04:21:00.000-08:00

The Impalers have Rhonda Stapleton here today to talk about DREAMS AND DESIRES 2: A Collection of Romance Tales, a special anthology collection she's participating in.

From the publisher, Freya's Bower:

By purchasing this collection, you can help turn someone's nightmare into the pursuit of dreams. Every year, four million women are assaulted by their partners. At Freya's Bower, we want to do our part to bring this statistic down to zero. To this end, all net proceeds from every Dreams and Desire anthology purchased will go to a battered woman's shelter. Through education and support, we can make a difference.

Authors: (in alphabetical order of last name): Jenna Bayley-Burke, Faith Bicknell-Brown, Amanda Brice, Sela Carsen, Rachelle Chase, Gemma Halliday, Candace Havens, Zinnia Hope, Jackie Kessler, Susan Lyons, Richelle Mead, Debbie Mumford, Rhonda Stapleton, Bebe Thomas, Emily Veinglory, Sasha White, Lois Winston, Shaunna Wolf, and Kit Wylde.

Here's the amazon link to purchase this anthology and help support the cause:

http://www.amazon.com/Dreams-Desires-Collection-Romance-Tales/dp/1934069736/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1201326840&sr=8-3

The Impalers want to put an end to domestic violence too, and watch for info in the next few weeks about our own efforts to raise money to rebuild the battered women's shelter in New Orleans.

And now, on to the fun stuff. Our random questions for author Rhonda Stapleton:

-What is your favorite vampire movie? Interview with a Vampire is near
the top of my list, of
course, as are Blade I and II. However, my all-time favorite HAS to be
the 1979 classic, Love at
First Bite, starring our favorite uber-tanned vamp George Hamilton.

-Would you like to stay up all night and sleep all day? What would you
miss about day-walking?
For the first question, I'd definitely like to stay up all night. I
used to be a night owl, but due to my day job, had to change my sleep patterns. For your second
question, I think the obvious answer here is sunshine; however, since northeast Ohio tends to not get much of it anyway, I think I'd probably miss dumb little things, like matinee prices at the movie theater, or "earlybird" shoe sales.

-What celebrity do you suspect is a vampire?

Ooooh, good question. I think it's probably someone no one would suspect, someone who looks innocent and sweet...like Betty White.

-What food would you miss the most if you were a vampire?

Chinese food. Oh, and sushi. And fried chicken. And pasta. Dang, I'd miss a lot of stuff.

-If you were an Impaler, what instrument would you play?

I'd be a vocalist. Or a rockin' drummer...you should see me tear it up with the Rock Band video game (nerd alert!).

-What is your favorite hobby? What would your hobby be if you were a
vampire?

My favorite hobby is photography. I have an awesome digital SLR, and I love it. If I were
a vampire, my favorite hobby would be staying alive. hahaha

-Vampires or werewolves? Why?

Vampires, hands down, because they are sexy and alluring. Werewolves creep me out. *shudder* Plus, the werewolf grooming factor alone makes them too
high-maintenance for me. haha

-Where is your favorite place to go on vacation?

Somewhere warm, with good happy-hour specials! Places I've been so far fit the bill: Hawaii and New Orleans.

-If you were a vampire, where would you sleep? Coffin? Darkened
bedroom? Crypt? Or other?

I don't think I could sleep in a coffin. Claustrophobia
and all that. It would have to be a super-dark bedroom with a huge bed. I tend to wiggle and
steal covers in my sleep.

-What's the best part of being a writer?

I get to make up weird conversations and situations in my head, and people think it's mysterious and part of the writerly process (instead of me just being weird--haha).

-If you were a vampire, what time period would you have been made one?
I think I would have been turned in Pre-Raphaelite England (mid to late 1800's).

-Who was a better vampire? Brad Pitt or Tom Cruise?

Brad Pitt, definitely.

You see that, Tom? Rhonda likes Brad better too.

Thanks for dropping by, Rhonda and hopefully we'll see you in New Orleans again in 2008!

Guest Author Jamie Denton

2008-02-06T04:33:00.000-08:00

Jamie Denton, known for her sizzling Harlequin Blaze stories and her romantic suspense books for Brava was gracious enough to take time away from writing her latest serial killer to chat with the vampire boys.

Her latest title, REMAIN SILENT, is up for Best Villian at All About Romance. Check it out at www.jamiedenton.net .

The Impalers read Remain Silent and as a result have decided that Jamie is one scary woman, and that she could easily find a way to end their undead lives if she set her mind to it.

Here's what Jamie had to say.

1. Why don’t you write about vampires?
Um…because Erin McCarthy and Kathy Love do it so much better than I ever could.

2. If you could go on a date with a vampire, what would you do?
Heh, heh, heh.

3. What is your favorite vampire movie?
Salem’s Lot, the original with David Soul. Scared the beejeebers out of me!

4. Would you like to stay up all night and sleep all day? What would you miss about day-walking?
I pretty much do that now. Maybe I’m really a vamp at heart? But I’d really miss those early bird sales during the holidays.

5. What celebrity do you suspect is a vampire?
Angelina Jolie. If there ever was a blood sucking bi…uh…woman, she’s it! Just ask Jennifer Anniston.

6. What food would you miss the most if you were a vampire?
Cheeseburgers!

7. What is your favorite hobby?
Knitting.

8. What would your hobby be if you were a vampire?
Flying. And that whole putting a glamour on someone thing seems like it’d be pretty cool, too.

9. Who is your idol?
Katherine Graham. Now there was a woman with ba…uh…teeth.

10. Vampires or werewolves? Why?
Definitely vampires. They don’t shed.

11. Where is your favorite place to go on vacation?
New York City because it’s the center of the universe.

12. If you were a vampire, where would you sleep? Coffin? Darkened bedroom? Crypt? Or other? If other, explain.
A suite at the Ava

13. If you weren't a writer, what would you be?
A millionaire.

14. What's the best part of being a writer?
No pantyhose! No makeup! And I can work all night and sleep all day if I want to..

15. If your were a vampire, what time period would you have been made one?
The Renaissance. Love the art from that period.

16. Who was a better vampire? Brad Pitt or Tom Cruise?
Brad Pitt. He’s cuter.

Thanks, Jamie! And that's three votes for Brad Pitt. Note to Vittorio: Long hair and melancholy eyes works with authors.

I'll Take Antonio Banderas

2008-01-30T04:19:00.000-08:00

It's Wednesday again, time for another Hump Day Interview. Today The Impalers are chatting with Christine Nolfi, who we met at the Heather Graham Conference in New Orleans last year. We think it's cool that Chris is a finalist in the Amazon Breakthrough Novel Awards, so go check out her entry. Then come back and read what she had to say to us, your curious roving vampire reporters.

Christine Nolfi-
Finalist, Amazon Breakthrough Novel Awards
“A Place to Belong” – Romance Division
http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00121SFS0

1. Why don’t you write about vampires?

I don’t have Erin or Kathy’s expertise. Any good novelist will tell you, “Write what you know.” Erin and Kathy have many friends in the vampire world. I don’t. They’re well connected to the movers and the shakers in the World of Blood, especially in New Orleans.

Frankly, I wear a turtleneck sweater whenever I’m around either one of these fabulous women. I’m simply never sure if they reside with the living or in the world of the undead.

2. Do you prefer long hair or short hair on your men (vampires, heroes, etc)?

Long hair, definitely. It’s such a nice compliment to the bad boy vibe. I’ve dated several vampires and every one has deliciously long, dark hair. These are men who may live among the undead, but they’re hot. Given their heightened animal instincts, they never fail to impress. And satisfy.

Of course, I wear a turtleneck on the date. A tight-fitting one.

3. What is your favorite vampire movie?

Interview with the Vampire. I’ll take Antonio Banderas with fangs any day of the week. The man has HEAT written across his every movement and expression in the film.

4. What food would you miss the most if you were a vampire?

Pasta. I’m not sure how one could eat a nice linguine without revealing fangs. Of course, vampires will have a light meal if it’s especially delicious. And they drink. One vampire I dated thoroughly enjoyed Bloody Marys. It was probably an inside joke, and no doubt he enjoyed watching me fiddle with my turtleneck while he languidly played with his swizzle stick.

5. Do you believe vampires are just people too? Why?

Absolutely. Vampires are just like you and me. They fall in love, pay taxes, have favorite haunts and close friends. Of course their favorite haunts involve crypts and coffins, and the occasional dank cave. Speaking of coffins, some are quite nice. Velvet lined, with music piped in. And if you’ve never been invited to a crypt for fine wine and serious groping, you don’t know what you’re missing. I’ve visited crypts that are quite palatial, and beautifully decorated.
Most people are acquainted with a vampire or two even if they don’t know it.

The dark-eyed stranger in the bar at 2 A.M. who keeps throwing sizzling glances your way? Vampire. The long-limbed babe magnet in the cubicle next to yours at work, the guy who always arrives early and stays late? Vampire. It’s true you’ll never meet the undead on a sunny beach, but who said love is perfect? On the up side, you’ll never have to pack sunscreen if you go off for a long weekend with your undead lover.

6. What is your favorite hobby? What would your favorite hobby be if you were a vampire?

Like most novelists, I enjoy spending my time reading and writing. Which is the hobby, and which is work? I’m never sure.

If I were a vampire, I’d enjoy the transfiguration thing. I’d love to be a bat. I’m not sure if I’d be a bat hobbyist, but I would enjoy winging through the night and eavesdropping on other people. Of course, novelists are notorious eavesdroppers, so I might come up with great material for a future book.

7. Vampires or werewolves? Why?

Vampires, definitely. I don’t mind a little blood on the sheets, but canine hair? That’s where I draw the line.

Thanks for stopping by, Christine, though we have to ask... why do all women dig Antonio Banderas??

Five For Friday

2008-01-25T06:15:00.000-08:00

I've decided to let you all in on some secrets about vampires. Private things that most mortals don't know. Myths that need to be dispelled.

1. Vampires are repelled by garlic.

Okay, vampires are actually fine with garlic. It's a great little seasoning. What would garlic bread be without it? It's when people wear links of the stuff that it gets dicey. But it isn't because we are vampires that we don't like it. No one likes that.

2. Vampires cast no reflection.

We do cast a reflection. They are a little hazy and see-through, but we do. How else would we do our hair? Or in Vittorio's case, his eyeliner. (He loves that whole 80's goth look.)

3. Vampires cannot go out into the sun.

This one is true. But what isn't known is that this intolerance to sunlight is actually because we cannot process vitamin D. It has nothing to do with dark vs. light, good vs. evil. It's an allergic reaction. Vampires are nerd s with allergies. It's true.

4. Vampires cannot eat food.

Oh, we can eat. We just can't process the food. Which means we have to get rid of it by other methods. And trust me, it ain't pretty. Can anyone say, eating disorder.

5. Vampires can turn into bats.

This one is true, and frankly just weird. Bats? Yeah, that's the best way to travel.

Do any of you have questions you'd like to ask about the whole vampire mythos? Ask away. I'd love to tell you the truth about our kind. Go ahead, hit me!

~ The Impalers

Hump Day Interviews

2008-01-23T04:26:00.000-08:00

Since Erin and Kathy have gotten us hooked on romance novels (good coffin reads), The Impalers have decided to have a guest author every Wednesday on the blog. We get to hear all about their latest book and then read their answers to questions about their writing (and other stuff we just wanted to know). We think we're the first official undead book club.

So today we're checking out J.C. Wilder...

Winter's Daughter by J. C. Wilder
ISBN: 1-59998-843-7
Length: Novel
Price: $5.50
Genre: Paranormal Romantic Suspense
Publication Date: December 7, 2007

The Coven, Book I
Bubble, bubble, toil and trouble...Twenty years after the untimely death of her mother and cruel separationfrom her sisters, Synnamon Angelov returns to her abandoned childhood homein Salem, Ohio. She is determined to find her sisters and search for theanswers behind the half-buried memories and nightmares that still plagueher. Not surprisingly, the superstitious people of Salem aren't all happy that Syn is back in town.

http://www.mybookstoreandmore.com/product_info.php?products_id=778

Here's what J.C. had to say in response to our questions:

1. Why do you write about vampires?
I didn't choose the genre, it chose me. When I began writing my first book,ONE WITH THE HUNGER, my hero Val simply appeared as one. It was a surprise to me.

2. If you could go on a date with a vampire, what would you do?
Depends if he's hungry or not. :)

3. Do you prefer long hair or short hair on your men (vampires, heroes, etc)?
Long. A girl needs something to hang on to when she gets her good night kiss. :)

4. Why do you think blood is red as opposed to say blue, or green? (We know about the whole oxygen thing, but why do we actually see it as red?)
Red is the color of your root chakra, the basis of all life. I cannot imagine it would be any other color.

5. What is your favorite vampire movie?
Underworld

6. What is your favorite of the books you've written?
Usually it's the latest one. I'd say Winter's Daughter - there is more of mein that book than any other.

7. Would you like to stay up all night and sleep all day? What would you miss about day-walking?
I used to work nights so I lived that schedule for a year or so. I did miss seeing the sun but I can't think of any activity I missed. You can do just about anything at night that you can during the day, except for sunning yourself that is.

8. What celebrity do you suspect is a vampire?
Louis Black - no one can be that angst ridden without having lived at least two hundred years.

9. What food would you miss the most if you were a vampire?
Macaroni and Cheese, brownies and garlic bread - though not together of course.

10. If you were an Impaler, what instrument would you play?
Guitar, but I'm the most un-musical person on the planet. I can barely play a CD on a good day.

11. How did you start writing?
My father gave me a set of Laura Ingalls Wilder books and I instantly fell in love with the written word. Then I received a set of C.S. Lewis' Narniatales and that was it for me. I'd finally found a way to channel all of my creative energies into something that 'fit' me.

12. What is your favorite hobby? What would your hobby be if you were a vampire?
Making jewelry, painting - I don't think it would change should I become a vampire. In fact I'd probably have more time to play as I wouldn't have to cook!

13. What's your favorite song?
This is very possibly the most difficult question anyone has ever asked me.I am so into music, I traveled with an alternative rock band in my twenties,and I can't narrow it down to just one. So how about a few:Black - Pearl JamCuz I Can - PinkHibernation - Ted NugentThe Low Spark of High-Heeled Boys - TrafficThe End - Doors

14. Who is your idol?
My father.

15. Which Impaler would you date?
I've always had a thing for drummers...

16. Vampires or werewolves? Why?
Vamps! The whole furry thing just doesn't do it for me.

17. Where is your favorite place to go on vacation?
New Orleans, it's my second home.

18. If you were a vampire, where would you sleep? Coffin? Darkened bedroom? Crypt? Or other?
A coffin for one night, then I'd be over it. A nice, fluffy bed with heavycurtains.

19. If you weren't a writer, what would you be?
Artist

20. If you could be any preternatural creature, what would it be?
Were-cat!

21. What's the best part of being a writer?
Being able to work in my underwear!

22. Of all the characters you've created, who's your favorite?
Syn from Winter's Daughter

23. What is your favorite color?
Purple

24. If you were a vampire, what time period would you have been turned in?
Ancient Egypt

26. Who was a better vampire? Brad Pitt or Tom Cruise?
Brad Pitt - Cruise's character was SUCH a whiner!

Thanks, J.C... you are definitely a chick who knows her way around vampires. Make sure you stop by and say hey next time you're in New Orleans.

What do you all think? Is Tom Cruise a whiner?

Happy Hump Day,
The Impalers

Upcoming Updates

2008-01-18T06:19:00.000-08:00

Howdy Impaleriacs,
(That doesn't exactly roll off the tongue, does it?)

Anyhow, I wanted to tell you about updates, which should be happening in the next couple days.

* A new installment of Drake, Tales of A Lusty Pirate
* New pics of the band members
* New band members introduced (namely, me.)

Also on the blog...

* Hump Day interviews with some of our favorite authors
* The Impalers book club
* And other odds and ends that we want to chat about. (Okay, mostly Ren talking about what he wants to talk about. Shh, don't tell him I said that.)

So keep checking in, there's lots of new stuff ahead.

~Buck (one of the newest members of The Impalers)

Bandits of Romance

2008-01-17T07:58:00.001-08:00

I gotta say I like that image. In fact, I think Wyatt may have written a song about that. Or not.
What am I talking about, you ask?

I'm talking about the fact that our very own Kathy Love is over chatting at the Romance Bandits about her newest book and the creation of us. And you know you want to read about that.

So go check them out, and all you little bandits, please post something here. We love new blood.

Cheers,
Ren

Am I Just a Dirty Old Man With Fangs?

2007-12-05T12:10:00.000-08:00

Hey There,

Okay, the ladies over at The Midnight Hour are discussing a very interesting topic. One that I have thought about a lot myself--what with being an 222 year old vampire and all. Their discussion is in relation to vampires in young adult novels, but I have still thought about this problem in relation to myself, too. Since most of the women I've dated are usually 190 or so years

younger than me (Maggie is 194 years younger than I am), then does that just make me a dirty old man with some killer dental work? (Note, the picture of me contemplating this very matter.)

I like to think I'm no such thing. Okay, I have lived that long, but I did stop aging at thirty. In which case, I'm dating in my appropriate age range. I mean, why would I suddenly stop being attracted to women in my same physical age group? And frankly, 190 year old mortal women are pretty hard to come by. Really any woman over 100 is a little dicey. I think there is something worse about dating women who often don't know where they are and sometimes mistake me for their grandson than dating someone my own physical age. Not that I've actually dated women that old, but it does seem like one the inherent perils of such a relationship. And thus one of the many, many reasons I've never gone there.

While I have lived much longer than Maggie, I don't feel like an old man to her twenty-something years. And actually, in my case, I've made a concerted effort to remain as immature as I was during my live thirtieth year, which has to work in my favor, right? (Okay, Maggie might argue that point.)

But what is your take? Are vampires too old for their mortal love interests? Am I just a perv with the hots of the younger ladies? (Although I'm not going on the nursing home circuit--no matter what your opinion is.)

Cheers,

Ren

Impalers Blog Party!!!

2007-10-27T16:28:00.000-07:00

Reader Jennifer is throwing us a party on her blog all this week. How cool is that? Stop by http://jennifersrandommusings.wordpress.com/ to hang with us (The Impalers) and to read interviews with vampire authors Erin McCarthy and Kathy Love.

And did we mention FREE STUFF? Books and other random fun stuff will be up for grabs to readers who post.

So come visit us and Get Impaled... you know you want it!

Ten For Tuedsay

2007-10-23T05:53:00.001-07:00

Okay, we were tagged by an old vampire pal of ours, Buck Bellamy who is thinking about joining The Impalers as our new bass player. He's actually a bit of a young'un (his way of saying it) compared to some of us, because he wasn't made a vampire until 1849. He was part of the gold rush, which didn't lead him to fame and fortune, but instead fangs and possibly fleas. (Although he he might have had the fleas to begin with.)

Anyway, he tagged us for "Ten for Tuesday."

So his question is name ten songs that make you think of vampires...or other paranormal creatures.

Ren- Devil Inside by INXS. I love that song, man.

Vittorio- Moon over Bourbon Street/Sting

Johnny- One Night In Bangkok by Murray Head (although I think this is a personal memory and the song would very likely not make anyone else think of vampires. Apparently it's really about chess.)

Dave- The Batman theme...well, it makes me think of bats anyway.

Wyatt- Love Bites by Judas Priest

Jack-Psycho Killer by The Talking Heads. Not that vampires kill people--much.

Drake- I'm Your Boogie Man by KC and the Sunshine Band. Hey, the 70's were a wild time in my vampire years!

Alastair- Bloodletting by Concrete Blonde

Fin- Little Red Riding Hood by Sam the Sham and the Pharaohs Go werewolves!

Ren- Oh! I thought of another one! Love Song for a Vampire by Annie Lennox, because as you know, vampires need love too.
:)

What songs remind you of vampires, werewolves or any other paranormal creature? What's your favorite Halloween song?

Excerpt from ANY WAY YOU WANT IT

2007-10-19T07:32:00.000-07:00

Excerpt from ANY WAY YOU WANT IT

by Kathy Love

A January 2008 release from Kensington Brava

"This is...something," Maggie managed, peering around, not sure where to look at next.

Even Jo and Erika, who were definitely worldlier when it came to bars and partying, gawked around themselves in awe.

"This is pretty amazing," Erika finally said, after they'd all stood mesmerized by a pair of female mannequin legs in black stilettos, kicking in and out of a club's windows.

"You definitely don't see that every day, do you?" Jo said.

Maggie almost added that she'd never seen that before, period, when her attention was seized by a distinct strain of music, somehow reaching out to her over the warring chords of Jessie's Girl, Living On A Prayer and Summer of '69.

Without thinking, she took a step toward the sound. Then another--until she'd zigzagged through the crowds of revelers to a bar on the corner of Bourbon and some cross street.

She stopped on the sidewalk, staring at the building. The place was shabby, paint peeling from the wood, the sidewalk around it crumbling and layered in filthy. But from her spot on the street, she could see the stage through huge opened windows where a band was setting up. And she could clearly hear that distinct melody. Piano notes swirling through the air, a sound as out of place in this world as she felt.

Again, her feet moved until she found herself in the bar, standing in front of the stage, peering up at the person playing the music. Music that no one else should know.

Well, no one but her and possibly a few other authenticators. And the person who wrote it, of course. But that person was long since dead.

"Wow," Jo said from beside her, dragging Maggie's attention away from the music. "Good eye. That guy's pretty darn hot."

Maggie blinked back at the stage, for the first time noticing the man actually playing the music. He was tall with long hair in a shade somewhere between chestnut brown and dark mahogany, cascading over his broad shoulders.

He was looking down at the keyboards, his hair falling forward, shrouding most of his features, so that Maggie wondered how Jo could tell whether he was hot or not.

Then the thought quickly vanished as she watched his long fingers travel over the keys, playing a particularly difficult combination of chords. That combination exactly what she'd been studying so closely before she'd left. A fusion of notes that seemed to be a signature of sorts.
If Maggie's belief was correct, a signature of a composer that she was will to bet this man playing, a guy in a cover band on Bourbon street no less, had never even heard of. Much less could play.

Yet, here he was, playing it. Playing a piece that no one knew. An undiscovered composition probably by a lesser known composer.

Then two things happened at once, the beautiful, haunting tune abruptly switched into the intro to the classic 80's rock ballad, Sister Christian, and Maggie realized that the musician was staring directly at her. And she was staring back.

"Ah, man, he has a lazy eye," Erika said with a disappointed sigh.

Maggie heard her friend's words and regret, but somehow they didn't seem to quite reach her as if they echoed from a distance or through a somnolent haze. She just kept staring at the man, unable to look away, even though everything in her told her to do just that.

"There is something up with his eye, but I don't think it's lazy." Maggie heard Jo say.

Maggie wanted to speak, to say there wasn't anything wrong with his eyes, but the words in her head couldn't fumble their way her lips. All she could manage was to focus on him. On the eyes in question. Eyes that seemed to match the music he'd been playing, complicated, intense, haunted. And just as the music held her entranced, so did his gaze.

Until finally, a small smile curved his lips and then his gaze left her as he concentrated on his keyboards.

Excerpt from SUCKER BET

2007-10-17T04:33:00.000-07:00

Sucker Bet

by Erin McCarthy
January 2008 release from Berkley Sensation

Gwenna smiled at him, and Nate felt something he sure in the hell shouldn’t. It was a kick of lust, right where it counted. Which scared the crap out of him. The mind was weak at the moment, yet the body still was totally functioning, which made this a bad thing. A stupid idea.

This was him with his head up his ass if he went up that elevator with her.

He went.

Which meant he was a total idiot.

But he was on the edge, and he knew it. Everything he felt, everything he’d lost, the hurt, the fear, the bitterness, swirled around inside him and threatened to take him down. He was going to crack, soon, the pressure pulling inside his skull, the lack of sleep, that last phone call to his parents, the indignity of yet another mindless murder on tonight of all nights, pushing and tugging at him.

It was Gwenna Carrick or a bottle of Jack, and she was a hell of lot more attractive than him drunk.

“What floor?” he asked as they stepped into an elevator with a thirty-something couple who were leaning dangerously close to each other.

“Sixteen.”

Gwenna glanced over at the pair dressed in cocktail party clothes. Nate watched her eyes widen a little at the fact that the couple was now making out vigorously. With lots of hand, tongue, and leg movement. Well, that was special. Shifting a little to block her view, aware that the guy’s hand had just gone up the woman’s skirt, Nate tried to think of something inane and conversational to say. “So…”

He had nothing. Especially since Gwenna had moved a little to see around him. Instead of being appalled at the public fondling, she looked curious. Intrigued. She wet her lips. His own immediate and painful reaction to that was an instant boner. No hesitation, no slow inflate, just up, hard, and ready to go.

Which was more disgusting than the happy gropers behind him. He couldn’t understand how he could get an erection on the same night he’d been to a crime scene and watched his sister die. It was like confirmation of everything he’d ever been told by his grandmother- his animalistic male body was totally disconnected from his emotions.

On the other hand, maybe it was just a coping mechanism of some kind. Distract him from the rough stuff with a simple physical response. That sounded right on with what a therapist would tell him.

But he was starting to think maybe he should have stuck to the Jack Daniels idea, because the last thing he or Gwenna Carrick needed was a one-night stand.

The elevator dinged right as the woman let out an encouraging moan in the small space, and her back slammed against the wall from a particularly aggressive lunge at her breasts by her guy.

“This is our floor,” Gwenna said.

Thank God.

They stepped off as Gwenna murmured, “Well, those two are in for a fun night.”

“Doesn’t feel very fair, does it?” he said, glancing into the empty spa as she used a key card to open the locked door. “They’re going up without a care in the world to bang each other’s brains out, and here we are. Day from hell for both of us.”

She glanced back at him, blue eyes filled with compassion. “I think it’s safe to say yours has been worse from mine.”

Damn, she really was beautiful. Just pale and soft, all pink lips and shiny hair.

What would she do if he just reached over and kissed her? If he just grabbed on, held tight, and buried himself and all his thoughts inside her?

God, he was wrecked. He needed to go home. “Maybe I should just go, Gwenna. I’m walking the edge here… I don’t think I’m very good company.”

“Don’t go.” Moving in closer to him, her hair brushed along his jaw, her petite hands touching his chest. “I want you to stay.”

Then she tilted her head up to look at him, her fair skin stark in the muted glow from the overnight lights.

“Why?” he asked, standing stiffly, aware of how soft she felt, how delicate and feminine, and how much bigger he was than her. The scent of her was delicious- fruity and womanly, with a hint of coffee- and Nate wanted to run his fingers through her pale, silken hair and just let it go, let it all go.

“Because I don’t want to be alone,” she said simply. “And neither do you.”

Then she lifted her mouth and kissed him.

What To Do In The Big Easy

2007-10-10T05:36:00.000-07:00

Dave Foster here, back and brave enough to pose the same question to the guys:
What do you like about New Orleans?

Ren: Me being in it.

Vittorio rolls his eyes.

Ren: What? It was a joke. Man, you’re uptight. Okay, seriously, the Saints. I’m a huge football fan.

Dave Foster: Go Saints. So what does Erika’s fair-haired, dark eyed prince like?

Vittorio: Does she really call me that? Cool. One of my favorite places to go in New Orleans in Déjà Vu.

Dave Foster: The strip club? Dude, not appropriate for this blog.

Vittorio: No, not the strip club! Déjà Vu, the restaurant.

Ren: You can’t eat food.

Vittorio: But it’s a great place to go and energy suck. The mortals are too into their patty melts to notice what I’m doing.

Dave Foster: You know, never mind. Kathy and Erin gave some real suggestions on things to do in New Orleans and we’re just going to skip right to that.

Here’s their top ten list:

1) Eat a beignet http://www.cafedumonde.com/main.html

2) Go on a swamp tour http://www.cajunprideswamptours.com/

3) Cheer on the Saints http://www.neworleans.com/Sports_-_Saints_Home/

4) Dine al fresco http://www.courtoftwosisters.com/

5) Stay in a haunted hotel http://www.frenchquarterinns.com/andrewjacksonhotel/

6) Visit the Cities of the Dead http://www.saveourcemeteries.org/tours/index.htm

7) Explore voodoo http://www.voodooshop.com/

8) Visit River Road Plantations http://www.oakalleyplantation.com/

9) Have your tea leaves read http://www.bottomofthecup.com/

10) Visit our favorite vampire musicians playing on Bourbon Street
http://www.oldoperahouse.com/
http://www.thebestofbourbonstreet.com/fd_home.html
http://www.bourbonsbest.com/utopia.html

What The Girls Are Saying (and Arguing About)

2007-10-08T07:33:00.000-07:00

Hello again. It's me, Dave Foster, back with more interviews with the woman behind the The Impalers.

This week I'm interviewing Maggie Gallagher, the lady who keeps Ren somewhat grounded, Erika Todd, who managed to make our very own Vittorio smile (and have a sex drive). And finally, Jo Asher, who is just getting onto the scene (and is a little behind on the whole vampire thing…so shhh.).

Dave Foster: The Impalers in their various incarnations have lived New Orleans for cent--glances at Jo--for years. All you ladies are relatively new to this area. What are your favorite things about The Big Easy?

Maggie: I love the vibe of the city. It's so exciting and liberating. And the music is fantastic. And of course, I love my Ren.

Erika: I agree with Maggie, the vibe of the city is amazing. It speaks to the artist in me. I just love the eclectic mixture of people and talents. And I, of course, dig the whole paranormal feel here. And then there is my fair-haired, dark-eyed prince, Vittorio.

Jo raises an eyebrow looking mildly nauseated: I just came here because I could get a job. And while I really like the architecture, the people, and the food, I could do without all the paranormal mumbo jumbo.

Erika turns to Jo: There's really nothing to fear in the occult. Psychics have helped me make some of the best decision of my life.

Maggie: Well, there were those nightmares brought on by Maksim.

Erika: Those were bad, but they brought my fair-haired, dark-eyed prince to me.

Jo grimaces: Does Vittorio really like you to call him that? And Maksim? Isn't he that guy who knows Ren and Vittorio? How could he cause you nightmares? He's really sexy by the way.

Maggie: If horns and cloven hooves are sexy.

Jo frowns obviously confused.

Dave Foster clears is throat: Speaking of Ren and Vittorio, what is life like with them, Maggie and Erika?

Maggie: Great. Ren can be a little moody at times, and he does have better hair than I do. And he can be a little egotistical at times, but I wouldn't trade him in for anyone else.

Erika: Vittorio is lovely. Perfect. My fair--

Jo interrupts: God, don't even say it again!

Erika looks puzzled by Jo's outburst: What?

Maggie: Jo, you really should start considering there are things out there that aren't understood. Like psychics and ghosts and maybe even, say, vampires.

Jo shakes her head: Vampires? Next you'll be talking about demons. Whatever. I don't buy into that stuff. Sorry.

All the woman sit forward on their chairs, looking ready for a big debate.

Dave Foster cuts off the impending argument: Okay, ladies, thanks for the interview and sharing your likes--and dislikes--of New Orleans. I know some of the readers of this blog have been to New Orleans. What did you like about The Big Easy?

Tag, You're It

2007-10-05T04:56:00.000-07:00

Erin emailed us and said she was blog tagged, which sounds a lot like what they do to marine animals. But she explained what it is really, and seeing that she and Kathy are on deadline and busy (yeah, whatever), they asked us to fill in for them. All we have to do is talk about ourselves, and what undead musician doesn’t want to do that? So we’re in.

Here’s how it works…
Players offer eight random habits/facts about themselves. If you’re tagged, you need to write your own blog about your eight things and post the rules. At the end of your blog post, you need to choose eight people to tag- and list their names. If you participate, don’t forget to leave your people a comment telling them they’re tagged, and to read your blog.

Random facts about The Impalers and friends:

Drake- I’ve eaten dirt. Don’t ask why. I’m just saying that things happen.

David Foster- I try to hit Disney World at least one a year. Happiest Place on Earth, man, and I dig those little dolls in the It’s a Small World ride. It’s a freak out, but in a good way.

Johnny- You know the Danny character in Grease? They based him on me. For real.

Ren- The food I miss most? Butter. Really.

Vittorio- I love horror movies, but Mommy Dearest scares the crap out of me. Just seeing Joan Crawford's eyebrows makes me run.

Buck- I wanted to be a rodeo clown, but the guys told me I'd never get a woman wearing face paint and hiding in barrels.

Jack- I used to sell Amway.

Fin- I like to spend my weekends off wearing a kilt at Renaissance Festivals because a skirt just makes everything better.

We’re tagging:
Rhonda Stapleton
Arianna Hart
Jamie Denton
Janice Maynard

That’s only 4 people instead of 8 but how many authors do you think vampires know? And we suck (get it? Suck) at following rules anyway.

Chatrooms and Sassy Women

2007-10-04T05:52:00.000-07:00

Last night we did our first online chat--and it was killer! Working on Bourbon, we meet some crazy hot chicks, but they've got nothing on the chatroom ladies at Writerspace.

Okay, we couldn't actually see them, but let me tell you, these ladies were sassy, funny and frankly, admired a fine musician whent they met one. (Oh, and they seemed to like Erin and Kathy's books okay, too.)

It was an excellent time. We'd love to do it again.
Thanks to all of you who joined us.

~The Impalers (really, it's Ren. Hi Ladies...)

Chat With The Impalers TONIGHT!!!

2007-10-03T07:04:00.000-07:00

Come chat with The Impalers, the greatest undead rock group in history!

Join Erin McCarthy, Kathy Love, and the boys at Writerspace this Wednesday,Oct 3rd at 9 EST. (That's tonight!!!)

Talk with dead guys and romance authors! Sex, blood and rock n' roll! It should be a fun and interesting time. You never know what the topic of conversation will be with vampires.
See you there!

http://www.writerspace.com/chat/

What The Girls Are Saying

2007-10-01T14:36:00.000-07:00

Interview conducted by David Foster, Roving Impaler Reporter (aka bored vampire passing the time)

David Foster: The Impalers just played a show in Vegas, and it’s a great town. What do you all like about Vegas?

Cara Kim: Money. The best part of living in Vegas is that I can rake in a ton of money exotic dancing to pay for my education and my grandmother’s nursing home. Okay, so not what I always pictured myself doing, but I stay behind the screen, and the bouncers make sure no freaks come near me. Until Seamus Fox came along, but for the most part he’s more hottie than freak.

Alexis Baldizzi- Carrick: Crime. There’s a ton of it, like any other major city. But in Vegas I get to prosecute criminals to the fullest extent of the law and there is no better feeling than watching some scumbag get tossed in jail and kept off the streets. I was positive Ethan Carrick had kidnapped my sister-

Brittany Baldizzi interrupts: I wasn’t kidnapped, I was trying to save Ethan’s soul from eternal damnation.

Alexis Baldizzi- Carrick: Whatever. He was an arrogant you-know-what, but I fell in love with him and now live in his glitzy casino. Go figure.

Brittany Baldizzi: People. I just love how everyone in Vegas is so friendly-

Alexis Baldizzi-Carrick interrupts: They’re probably drunk.

Brittany Baldizzi ignores her sister: -and cheerful. That’s why I don’t understand why Corbin is so moody all the time, but I have news that I’m sure will put a smile on his face. Or send him screaming.

Gwenna Carrick: I like the freedom of Vegas, where no one knows me and my past and I can start fresh, and be independent. Even though my ex-husband is a bloody idiot and I wish he’d fry in the desert instead of calling me a hundred times a day, I think I’m ready to meet someone new in Sin City. If you know of any candidates, give him my number, but leave out the nine hundred year old vampire bit.

Kelsey Columbia: I love being anywhere my husband, Ringo, is. And I love the bars, the dancing, the gambling, the super awesome shopping, the music, and The Impalers. So until tomorrow night, be at peace.

David Foster: Ever been to Vegas? What do you like (or don’t like) about it? Later this week we’ll hear from Maggie, Erika, and Jo on the virtues (or lack thereof) of the Big Easy- New Orleans.

Guest Blogger: Jack Taggert (aka Varius Tagaris)

2007-09-30T08:53:00.001-07:00

In case any of you were wondering, yes. a vampire can get a hangover.

That's really all I have to say--or can say--at the moment.

No wait, I do have one more thing to add. Black coffee and aspirin do not help a vampire hangover. Poetic justice, I guess.

I must crawl back to my coffin now.

Random Vampire Thought

2007-09-26T20:50:00.000-07:00

I just realized in the 222 years that I've been in existence, I've had 659 toothbrushes.

~Ren

Contest Winners

2007-09-23T14:45:00.000-07:00

Okay--sorry for the delay.
But we vampires got things to do, people to bite.
Geesh!

Here are the winners...
Sharon Berger
Allison Green
Steffanie Turner

And because so many people entered--(and yes, we are doing this without the permission of Erin and Kathy--but we'll use our psychic mind control to make them bow to our will), we are picking one more winner.

And that lucky additional winner is...
Carmen Rexford

Congrats to all of you who played. Everyone answered correctly, which makes us happy. Especially Drake, since two of the questions had to do directly with him. I swear Erin and Kathy favor that boy.

Keep checking back. We will be running more contests, and Kathy and Erin will be updating Drake's story weekly. And read the blog--and chat with us!
Vampires get lonely.

Congrats again to the winners!

~Ren and The Impalers

Talk Like a Pirate Day?

2007-09-21T05:02:00.000-07:00

First of all...what?

As you all know, I work on Bourbon Street, which in and of itself can be damned strange, but just the other night, it got even weirder. All these people kept staggering into our bar, talking in these terrible brogues and using phrases like "ahoy, matey!" and "shiver me timbers!"

Now people on Bourbon are not known for sobriety...or being normal, really. And thanks to that dude, Johnny Depp, people do fancy themselves as pirates on a more regular basis. But this was too many--even for the undeniable fandom of Mr. Depp. I mean, "argh" echoed through the air like some sort of wacked Gregorian chant.

Finally, Ren asked the crowd, what the hell they were doing. They gleefully (and still in those awful fake accents) announced it was "Talk like a pirate day."

Again, I ask you, what?

Okay, I was a pirate. And I never--never--talked like that. Not once did I say, "ahoy, mateys." Nor did I hear anyone else say it. I did often hear, "Look! A whore, mateys." I mean we spent a lot of time around the docks. Docks are seedy places--lots of whores there. And we discussed that fact often, and with great joy.

I never heard "shiver me timbers." I don't even know what the hell that means. And what man in their right mind would shout, "Thar she blows," to a shipload of men who've been out to sea for weeks. Do you want to incite a riot??

(Although, I may have heard that one on the docks, too.)

So if you want to know how real pirates spoke--and what they did--which wasn't flouncing round wearing smudged black eyeliner and ruffles (okay, I might have done that a bit), then go read Erin and Kathy's serial about me--Drake: Tales of a Lusty Pirate. It is purely accurate, as I am reciting the events directly to them.

(Okay, it's mostly accurate. Go read it, and tell me what you think?)

And what's your favorite pirate phrase? I'll let you know if we said it.

Thanks from Johnny

2007-09-18T14:35:00.000-07:00

Just about to crawl into my coffin for my slumber, but I wanted to say thank you to Kathy and Erin for asking me to take over the drumming position in The Impalers. The party was great, spirits were high, energy was flowing. All in all, a great party. I enjoyed meeting everyone. Thanks for the opportunity. See you next time. "Get Impaled!!"

Contest

2007-09-13T13:35:00.000-07:00

Since The Impalers were such a hit at Heather Graham's Writers for New Orleans conference, Erin and I have decided to run a contest to celebrate. A rockin' contest based around our undead supergroup, who really done us proud.

And what do I win, you ask?
Well, let me tell you.

The prizes are...

Advance reader copies of both my own, Any Way You Want It, featuring Impalers' frontman, Ren D'Antoni--

and Erin's Sucker Bet, where the heroine, Gwenna Carrick, rocks out at an Impalers concert.

And the best part, these books are not officially available until January 2008--so you can read about the Impalers before anyone else.

Plus you will also win a CD of The Impalers (yes, the real Impalers) performing Any Way You Want It and I Want You To Want Me. Undead guys playing some of your favorite 80's cover tunes! Pretty cool, huh?

So what do you have to do to win all these awesome vampire-y goodies?
It's very simple...

Erin and I are writing a free online serial called Drake: Tales of A Lusty Pirate, which we will be updating on a regular basis. Please go to the story (on The Impalers site) and answer the following questions...
(Make sure to send the answers directly to me at kathy@readkathylove.com)

1. Where is Drake at the beginning of the story?

2. What is Drake's love interest's name?

3. Peruse the pictures in the Gallery (also on The Impalers site), find Ren, and then tell me what Ren's real life name is.

We will pick 3 winners, and they will be announced on Friday the 21st.
Good luck!
:)
Kathy

Rocking The Writing World

2007-09-07T08:21:00.000-07:00

Hey Y'all!

Well, as you may have noticed, The Impalers have been away for awhile. We've been touring some, sleeping some, meeting new folks and drinking blood all along the way.

But now we are back in New Orleans, and to celebrate our homecoming, we just played the Hotel Monteleone for Heather Graham's Writers for New Orleans conference. And it was a damned fine welcome back. Erin McCarthy and Kathy Love sponsored us, and the attendees enjoyed themselves, hitting the dance floor and gettin' their groove on.

This was our first time doing a gig like this. And let me tell you--writers rock! We cannot state enough how great a conference and party this was. If you've considered attending, then definitely do so! We hope to be back again next year, singing, mingling and looking for prospective new tasty treats. :)

Okay, we honestly won't bite.

Not on the job anyway.

Check out the photos below. And check back for new ones.

AND Erin and Kathy are going to be running a contest soon.

Plus they will be posting a free serial read about our very own Drake--the lusty pirate. Look for new updates weekly. There is lots to come, so return often. And please do chat with us.

We love new blood. (Okay, okay enough with the vampire humor, right?)

Ciao for now,

The Impalers

Kathy and Erin with The Impalers

Drake before the show.

Ren singing his heart out for the crowd.

Johnny pumped up after the show.

And The Award Goes To...

2007-03-26T16:25:00.000-07:00

The Impalers and I would like to congratulate Erin on her RITA nomination in Best Contemporary Single-Title Romance for her book Heiress For Hire.

The winner will be announced this July at the National Romance Writers of America conference in Dallas.

The boys and I are rooting for you!

Congrats, Erin!

Kathy and The Impalers

Free Stuff

2007-03-22T10:05:00.000-07:00

Hey, I just wanted to let you know that our pals, Erin and Kathy, are running a pretty cool contest over at The Midnight Hour blog. Which by the way, if you haven't check out this Midnight Hour site--it's pretty darn cool. Lots of chat about spooky stuff.

Right up our alley.

Anyway, Kathy and Erin are running a contest where you can win their autographed books. If you answer triva about us. Now that's always fun.

So go check it out.

Cheers,

Ren

Curses

2007-03-16T09:30:00.000-07:00

So. Curses.

Do any of you believe in them?

I mean, maybe not something as clichéd as the "evil eye." Although, who's a vampire to make fun of something like an evil eye. But do you think curses happen to ordinary people--not just the dentally cursed or the phases of the moon cursed? (Which reminds me, ask me to post about the hot little werewolf chick I met last week. She had great hair...that's a joke. But it is good story.)

Anyway, back to my regularly scheduled question. Do you think that curses happen to the average Joe? Do you think people are born cursed? Let's face it, we all know that dude who just seems to have bad luck. All the time.

I'm cursed. But that's something I brought upon myself. Well, sort of. Having a really dysfunctional family didn't help the situation. But I think some people are cursed for much lesser reasons than I am.

What's your thoughts?

And are any of you cursed?

(Cuz you know that misery loves company.)

Cheers,

Ren

(I'm the one in the good shirt, in case you didn't know.)

Least Favorite Things

2007-03-01T04:42:00.000-08:00

It seems like everything is getting on my nerves lately. Not a good thing for a vampire, since I have an eternity to be irritated. And the thing is, I like to think I’m an easy-going, upbeat guy. I like my job, for the most part. Like my friends, like my bandmates. But don’t you just have those things, or people, or nights, where you just want to throw something because everything is so freakin’ annoying?

What irritates me, in no particular order:

Men jumping up on stage while the band is playing- Women on stage is good, but men? Come on. It’s weird, dude.

Bad drivers- I hate getting cut off, getting slowed down in the fast lane by a Sunday driver, or the opposite- being tailed by someone two inches off my bumper when I’m already going eighty.
Spam email- Does anyone really buy the Viagra alternative from a spam email? If you actually do though, please don’t tell me about it.

Britany Spears media coverage- So she’s bald and in rehab, enough already.

Childproof lighters- Here’s an idea… just don’t let your kid play with a lighter.

Sloppy drunks- I’m all for having a good time, but don’t spill your drink on my guitar. I’m serious.

Cell phone addicts- You are not so important that you need to be available 24/7. And it’s rude to ignore the person you’re with to talk on the phone to the person you’re not with. Especially if we’re on a date and the caller is the ex-boyfriend/husband. That doesn’t make me happy.

Forgetting to pay the rent- one lousy day late and the fee is fifty bucks.

One uppers- No, not drugs. I mean those people who no matter what you say, do, or own, they've done it better, got it cheaper, or paid more to own the best.

So what gets on your nerves?

Drake

Favorite Things

2007-02-21T18:03:00.000-08:00

So I’ve been thinking about moving. Or going on the road for awhile, getting away from the same old, same old.

Then I realized that I’m way more attached to my stuff than I used to be. When I was younger I used to get pack up my guitar, twenty bucks, and hit the road with my thumb in the air to catch a ride. Doesn’t sound all that fun to me now because I need my stuff.

I’d have a hard time living without:
The Internet- man, what did vampires ever do without it? Email, downloading songs, Myspace… I can spend hours online.

Computer- obvious, I guess, given the Internet comment above, but I could get access to the Internet at public places. But I want my own computer with all my games and music software.

My guitar- okay, that hasn’t changed much in forty years.

Cell phone- None of these “reading minds” vampire crap for me. Just call my cell.

Lava lamp- Even with kick ass technology, nothing’s ever going to be groovier than a lava lamp.

Picture of Jenny- She was my mortal girlfriend back in the day. She’s a real estate agent and a grandmother now in St. Louis.

The rest I guess I could take or leave, but I do really like my ACDC t-shirt, my DVD collection, and my Saints jersey. It wouldn’t make me happy to lose any of those.

What can’t you all live without?

Dave

The Quiet Impaler

2007-02-04T08:15:00.000-08:00

I guess that's how the other guys would label me. I am the quiet one. Seems to me that when you open your mouth too much, you just create a heap of trouble. I learned that lesson the hard way. After all, it was my own big mouth and cocky attitude that got me where I am today.

So I've learned over my many, many years to just sit back and let others talk themselves in and out of messes and around in circles. It's safer to sit quietly in the background. Don't get me wrong--I will speak my piece when it's necessary, but otherwise, I just sit and watch. You learn a hell of a lot more by listening.

That's something I wish I'd know back when I was alive. Things would have gone much differently if I'd had the sense to pay attention rather than charge in. I could have protected those I'd sworn to protect. I could have done my job...

Ah, hell, see where rambling on gets you? Right back to saying too much.

Yeah, I'm the quiet one. It's the safest way to be. I mean don't you wish there were times when you could have just shut your mouth? Don't you wish there were things you'd never said?

Days Off

2007-01-20T10:09:00.000-08:00

Not having to go to work is usually a good thing, right? I mean, we all wait for our days off, count down to them, think they disappear too fast, and drag our asses back in when the work week starts up again.

But lately, I haven’t been looking forward to those free days because it seems like I don’t have anything to do but sleep. And I’ve got how many days off ahead of me? An eternity worth. Being a vampire is a forever gig and I’m bored already. At least when I’m playing in the band I’m killing time, hanging with the guys, watching people, doing something. Not to mention I need the cash. Not every vampire is independently wealthy with no freakin’ explanation for how he got that way. I don’t need to pay for food, but I do like a roof over my head and a new t-shirt every now and then.

Maybe I need a hobby since I’m about to OD on cartoons and decorating shows. Or a girlfriend. But the last time I went there it didn’t end all that great considering she almost decapitated me. Literally. That doesn’t say good things about my taste in women and I’m not exactly ready to dive back in with the sharks in skirts.

So if you had about a thousand years of life ahead of you and a skinny bank account, what would you want to do on your days off?

Dave, bored on Bourbon

Undead at Christmas

2006-12-26T16:52:00.000-08:00

You know, as a vampire, I gotta tell you, Christmas ain't one of my favorite holidays.

I'm sure that doesn't come as a complete surprise to you all. But still it needs to be said. Not because we vampires are the soulless undead who despise and fear everything holy. That's not how vampires are--well, some of them are--but it's not a mandatory trait. In fact, I know several quite devout vamps. I came from a very religious family myself.

I dislike... (I won't go so far as to say hate--but give me another century or so, then get back to me on that one) I dislike Christmas because it's so damned commercial. It's true. When I was a kid, Christmas was magical. I remember going to Grant Park with my older brother, Jimmy, to see the lighting of the Christmas tree. Even if we had a couple hits that day, we'd get them done and be there in time to see those beautiful lights come on and fill the air with holiday cheer. And we always went to the candlelight mass on Christmas Eve. Well, except for the year when Dad had to go whack a no-good named Stinky Vic. But even then, Mom had us all to church on Christmas Day. She also gave Dad a good talking to--and Dad never missed a mass again.

Not the mention from December 24th to the New Year, we'd put off roughing up some no-good who'd, say, stiffed our father on a deal. Or didn't make good on a debt. (well, with the exception of Stinky Vic--but that was really an unusual circumstance, which I will tell you about at a later date.) And if they had kids, we'd even give them couple days before Christmas Eve. No kids should spend their holiday visiting Pop in the hospital.

Back then, it was about the generosity of spirit and kindness and good will to others. And it was about family. Most importantly about family. My mother, Rosaleen, would make a huge dinner. My whole family would gather and we'd share stories of Christmases back in the homeland. My uncle Declan would play his fiddle and we'd sing old Christmas songs. And of course there were gifts. But I cared more about my family and being with them.

Now, it's about the stuff. The goods. What great and expensive toys will be waiting under the tree in the morning.

And that ain't right. It makes me sad. Which is why, now I actually choose to work. To be with my makeshift musical family. I worked Christmas with the band. We didn't go to mass or sing Christmas songs, but we did drink a lot.

Speaking of which, we are also working New Year's...well, some of us.
Come check us out if you happen to be around.

Here is the place and a list of times...*

Fat Catz
438 Bourbon Street
New Orleans, LA

Friday 29th at 8 pm
Saturday 30th at 8 pm
Sunday 31st at 8 pm

Come on by and get impaled. We dare you.

*These dates and the location are real, and Paul a.k.a. Johnny will be playing.

The Naming Of A Band

2006-12-21T13:24:00.000-08:00

Do you know how hard it is to get five guys to agree on a name for a band? It’s damn hard, especially when every guy is a couple of centuries old. You start to feel like you’re always right when you’ve got the kind of life experience we do.

The Impalers is working for us now. It’s a good name. Don’t even get me started on the last one we had… and I’m not going to point fingers, but a certain someone who knows who he is- and who can’t hold his liquor - thought it was brilliant. He was wrong. The Suckers is a crap name. It sucks, like the name says. Plain and simple. And the fact that we went on the road like that and played a gig in Vegas, for the President of the Vampire Nation, of all freaking people, (see Erin McCarthy’s High Stakes) was just rough.

But I’m over it. Really. And we’re back on Bourbon St., which is cool. With a better name.

So does a bad or annoying band name turn you off? Or is it just all about the music?

You can be honest. I don’t bite. During the day.

Drake

after dark...

2006-12-15T07:40:00.000-08:00

...the boys in the band come out to play.

Come play with us at www.vampireband.com.