Guest Author Jamie Denton

Jamie Denton, known for her sizzling Harlequin Blaze stories and her romantic suspense books for Brava was gracious enough to take time away from writing her latest serial killer to chat with the vampire boys.

Her latest title, REMAIN SILENT, is up for Best Villian at All About Romance. Check it out at www.jamiedenton.net .

The Impalers read Remain Silent and as a result have decided that Jamie is one scary woman, and that she could easily find a way to end their undead lives if she set her mind to it.

Here's what Jamie had to say.

1. Why don’t you write about vampires?
Um…because Erin McCarthy and Kathy Love do it so much better than I ever could.

2. If you could go on a date with a vampire, what would you do?
Heh, heh, heh.

3. What is your favorite vampire movie?
Salem’s Lot, the original with David Soul. Scared the beejeebers out of me!

4. Would you like to stay up all night and sleep all day? What would you miss about day-walking?
I pretty much do that now. Maybe I’m really a vamp at heart? But I’d really miss those early bird sales during the holidays.

5. What celebrity do you suspect is a vampire?
Angelina Jolie. If there ever was a blood sucking bi…uh…woman, she’s it! Just ask Jennifer Anniston.

6. What food would you miss the most if you were a vampire?
Cheeseburgers!

7. What is your favorite hobby?
Knitting.

8. What would your hobby be if you were a vampire?
Flying. And that whole putting a glamour on someone thing seems like it’d be pretty cool, too.

9. Who is your idol?
Katherine Graham. Now there was a woman with ba…uh…teeth.

10. Vampires or werewolves? Why?
Definitely vampires. They don’t shed.

11. Where is your favorite place to go on vacation?
New York City because it’s the center of the universe.

12. If you were a vampire, where would you sleep? Coffin? Darkened bedroom? Crypt? Or other? If other, explain.
A suite at the Ava

13. If you weren't a writer, what would you be?
A millionaire.

14. What's the best part of being a writer?
No pantyhose! No makeup! And I can work all night and sleep all day if I want to..

15. If your were a vampire, what time period would you have been made one?
The Renaissance. Love the art from that period.

16. Who was a better vampire? Brad Pitt or Tom Cruise?
Brad Pitt. He’s cuter.

Thanks, Jamie! And that's three votes for Brad Pitt. Note to Vittorio: Long hair and melancholy eyes works with authors.

I'll Take Antonio Banderas

It's Wednesday again, time for another Hump Day Interview. Today The Impalers are chatting with Christine Nolfi, who we met at the Heather Graham Conference in New Orleans last year. We think it's cool that Chris is a finalist in the Amazon Breakthrough Novel Awards, so go check out her entry. Then come back and read what she had to say to us, your curious roving vampire reporters.

Christine Nolfi-
Finalist, Amazon Breakthrough Novel Awards
“A Place to Belong” – Romance Division
http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00121SFS0

1. Why don’t you write about vampires?

I don’t have Erin or Kathy’s expertise. Any good novelist will tell you, “Write what you know.” Erin and Kathy have many friends in the vampire world. I don’t. They’re well connected to the movers and the shakers in the World of Blood, especially in New Orleans.

Frankly, I wear a turtleneck sweater whenever I’m around either one of these fabulous women. I’m simply never sure if they reside with the living or in the world of the undead.

2. Do you prefer long hair or short hair on your men (vampires, heroes, etc)?

Long hair, definitely. It’s such a nice compliment to the bad boy vibe. I’ve dated several vampires and every one has deliciously long, dark hair. These are men who may live among the undead, but they’re hot. Given their heightened animal instincts, they never fail to impress. And satisfy.

Of course, I wear a turtleneck on the date. A tight-fitting one.

3. What is your favorite vampire movie?

Interview with the Vampire. I’ll take Antonio Banderas with fangs any day of the week. The man has HEAT written across his every movement and expression in the film.

4. What food would you miss the most if you were a vampire?

Pasta. I’m not sure how one could eat a nice linguine without revealing fangs. Of course, vampires will have a light meal if it’s especially delicious. And they drink. One vampire I dated thoroughly enjoyed Bloody Marys. It was probably an inside joke, and no doubt he enjoyed watching me fiddle with my turtleneck while he languidly played with his swizzle stick.

5. Do you believe vampires are just people too? Why?

Absolutely. Vampires are just like you and me. They fall in love, pay taxes, have favorite haunts and close friends. Of course their favorite haunts involve crypts and coffins, and the occasional dank cave. Speaking of coffins, some are quite nice. Velvet lined, with music piped in. And if you’ve never been invited to a crypt for fine wine and serious groping, you don’t know what you’re missing. I’ve visited crypts that are quite palatial, and beautifully decorated.
Most people are acquainted with a vampire or two even if they don’t know it.

The dark-eyed stranger in the bar at 2 A.M. who keeps throwing sizzling glances your way? Vampire. The long-limbed babe magnet in the cubicle next to yours at work, the guy who always arrives early and stays late? Vampire. It’s true you’ll never meet the undead on a sunny beach, but who said love is perfect? On the up side, you’ll never have to pack sunscreen if you go off for a long weekend with your undead lover.

6. What is your favorite hobby? What would your favorite hobby be if you were a vampire?

Like most novelists, I enjoy spending my time reading and writing. Which is the hobby, and which is work? I’m never sure.

If I were a vampire, I’d enjoy the transfiguration thing. I’d love to be a bat. I’m not sure if I’d be a bat hobbyist, but I would enjoy winging through the night and eavesdropping on other people. Of course, novelists are notorious eavesdroppers, so I might come up with great material for a future book.

7. Vampires or werewolves? Why?

Vampires, definitely. I don’t mind a little blood on the sheets, but canine hair? That’s where I draw the line.

Thanks for stopping by, Christine, though we have to ask... why do all women dig Antonio Banderas??

Five For Friday

I've decided to let you all in on some secrets about vampires. Private things that most mortals don't know. Myths that need to be dispelled.

1. Vampires are repelled by garlic.

Okay, vampires are actually fine with garlic. It's a great little seasoning. What would garlic bread be without it? It's when people wear links of the stuff that it gets dicey. But it isn't because we are vampires that we don't like it. No one likes that.

2. Vampires cast no reflection.

We do cast a reflection. They are a little hazy and see-through, but we do. How else would we do our hair? Or in Vittorio's case, his eyeliner. (He loves that whole 80's goth look.)

3. Vampires cannot go out into the sun.

This one is true. But what isn't known is that this intolerance to sunlight is actually because we cannot process vitamin D. It has nothing to do with dark vs. light, good vs. evil. It's an allergic reaction. Vampires are nerd s with allergies. It's true.

4. Vampires cannot eat food.

Oh, we can eat. We just can't process the food. Which means we have to get rid of it by other methods. And trust me, it ain't pretty. Can anyone say, eating disorder.

5. Vampires can turn into bats.

This one is true, and frankly just weird. Bats? Yeah, that's the best way to travel.

Do any of you have questions you'd like to ask about the whole vampire mythos? Ask away. I'd love to tell you the truth about our kind. Go ahead, hit me!

~ The Impalers

Hump Day Interviews

Since Erin and Kathy have gotten us hooked on romance novels (good coffin reads), The Impalers have decided to have a guest author every Wednesday on the blog. We get to hear all about their latest book and then read their answers to questions about their writing (and other stuff we just wanted to know). We think we're the first official undead book club.

So today we're checking out J.C. Wilder...

Winter's Daughter by J. C. Wilder
ISBN: 1-59998-843-7
Length: Novel
Price: $5.50
Genre: Paranormal Romantic Suspense
Publication Date: December 7, 2007


The Coven, Book I
Bubble, bubble, toil and trouble...Twenty years after the untimely death of her mother and cruel separationfrom her sisters, Synnamon Angelov returns to her abandoned childhood homein Salem, Ohio. She is determined to find her sisters and search for theanswers behind the half-buried memories and nightmares that still plagueher. Not surprisingly, the superstitious people of Salem aren't all happy that Syn is back in town.


http://www.mybookstoreandmore.com/product_info.php?products_id=778


Here's what J.C. had to say in response to our questions:

1. Why do you write about vampires?
I didn't choose the genre, it chose me. When I began writing my first book,ONE WITH THE HUNGER, my hero Val simply appeared as one. It was a surprise to me.

2. If you could go on a date with a vampire, what would you do?
Depends if he's hungry or not. :)

3. Do you prefer long hair or short hair on your men (vampires, heroes, etc)?
Long. A girl needs something to hang on to when she gets her good night kiss. :)

4. Why do you think blood is red as opposed to say blue, or green? (We know about the whole oxygen thing, but why do we actually see it as red?)
Red is the color of your root chakra, the basis of all life. I cannot imagine it would be any other color.

5. What is your favorite vampire movie?
Underworld

6. What is your favorite of the books you've written?
Usually it's the latest one. I'd say Winter's Daughter - there is more of mein that book than any other.

7. Would you like to stay up all night and sleep all day? What would you miss about day-walking?
I used to work nights so I lived that schedule for a year or so. I did miss seeing the sun but I can't think of any activity I missed. You can do just about anything at night that you can during the day, except for sunning yourself that is.

8. What celebrity do you suspect is a vampire?
Louis Black - no one can be that angst ridden without having lived at least two hundred years.

9. What food would you miss the most if you were a vampire?
Macaroni and Cheese, brownies and garlic bread - though not together of course.

10. If you were an Impaler, what instrument would you play?
Guitar, but I'm the most un-musical person on the planet. I can barely play a CD on a good day.

11. How did you start writing?
My father gave me a set of Laura Ingalls Wilder books and I instantly fell in love with the written word. Then I received a set of C.S. Lewis' Narniatales and that was it for me. I'd finally found a way to channel all of my creative energies into something that 'fit' me.

12. What is your favorite hobby? What would your hobby be if you were a vampire?
Making jewelry, painting - I don't think it would change should I become a vampire. In fact I'd probably have more time to play as I wouldn't have to cook!

13. What's your favorite song?
This is very possibly the most difficult question anyone has ever asked me.I am so into music, I traveled with an alternative rock band in my twenties,and I can't narrow it down to just one. So how about a few:Black - Pearl JamCuz I Can - PinkHibernation - Ted NugentThe Low Spark of High-Heeled Boys - TrafficThe End - Doors

14. Who is your idol?
My father.

15. Which Impaler would you date?
I've always had a thing for drummers...

16. Vampires or werewolves? Why?
Vamps! The whole furry thing just doesn't do it for me.

17. Where is your favorite place to go on vacation?
New Orleans, it's my second home.

18. If you were a vampire, where would you sleep? Coffin? Darkened bedroom? Crypt? Or other?
A coffin for one night, then I'd be over it. A nice, fluffy bed with heavycurtains.

19. If you weren't a writer, what would you be?
Artist

20. If you could be any preternatural creature, what would it be?
Were-cat!

21. What's the best part of being a writer?
Being able to work in my underwear!

22. Of all the characters you've created, who's your favorite?
Syn from Winter's Daughter

23. What is your favorite color?
Purple

24. If you were a vampire, what time period would you have been turned in?
Ancient Egypt

26. Who was a better vampire? Brad Pitt or Tom Cruise?
Brad Pitt - Cruise's character was SUCH a whiner!

Thanks, J.C... you are definitely a chick who knows her way around vampires. Make sure you stop by and say hey next time you're in New Orleans.

What do you all think? Is Tom Cruise a whiner?

Happy Hump Day,
The Impalers

Upcoming Updates

Howdy Impaleriacs,
(That doesn't exactly roll off the tongue, does it?)

Anyhow, I wanted to tell you about updates, which should be happening in the next couple days.

* A new installment of Drake, Tales of A Lusty Pirate
* New pics of the band members
* New band members introduced (namely, me.)

Also on the blog...

* Hump Day interviews with some of our favorite authors
* The Impalers book club
* And other odds and ends that we want to chat about. (Okay, mostly Ren talking about what he wants to talk about. Shh, don't tell him I said that.)

So keep checking in, there's lots of new stuff ahead.

~Buck (one of the newest members of The Impalers)

Bandits of Romance

I gotta say I like that image. In fact, I think Wyatt may have written a song about that. Or not.
What am I talking about, you ask?

I'm talking about the fact that our very own Kathy Love is over chatting at the Romance Bandits about her newest book and the creation of us. And you know you want to read about that.

So go check them out, and all you little bandits, please post something here. We love new blood.

Cheers,
Ren

Am I Just a Dirty Old Man With Fangs?

Hey There,

Okay, the ladies over at The Midnight Hour are discussing a very interesting topic. One that I have thought about a lot myself--what with being an 222 year old vampire and all. Their discussion is in relation to vampires in young adult novels, but I have still thought about this problem in relation to myself, too. Since most of the women I've dated are usually 190 or so years

younger than me (Maggie is 194 years younger than I am), then does that just make me a dirty old man with some killer dental work? (Note, the picture of me contemplating this very matter.)

I like to think I'm no such thing. Okay, I have lived that long, but I did stop aging at thirty. In which case, I'm dating in my appropriate age range. I mean, why would I suddenly stop being attracted to women in my same physical age group? And frankly, 190 year old mortal women are pretty hard to come by. Really any woman over 100 is a little dicey. I think there is something worse about dating women who often don't know where they are and sometimes mistake me for their grandson than dating someone my own physical age. Not that I've actually dated women that old, but it does seem like one the inherent perils of such a relationship. And thus one of the many, many reasons I've never gone there.

While I have lived much longer than Maggie, I don't feel like an old man to her twenty-something years. And actually, in my case, I've made a concerted effort to remain as immature as I was during my live thirtieth year, which has to work in my favor, right? (Okay, Maggie might argue that point.)

But what is your take? Are vampires too old for their mortal love interests? Am I just a perv with the hots of the younger ladies? (Although I'm not going on the nursing home circuit--no matter what your opinion is.)

Cheers,

Ren