I've decided to let you all in on some secrets about vampires. Private things that most mortals don't know. Myths that need to be dispelled.
1. Vampires are repelled by garlic.
Okay, vampires are actually fine with garlic. It's a great little seasoning. What would garlic bread be without it? It's when people wear links of the stuff that it gets dicey. But it isn't because we are vampires that we don't like it. No one likes that.
2. Vampires cast no reflection.
We do cast a reflection. They are a little hazy and see-through, but we do. How else would we do our hair? Or in Vittorio's case, his eyeliner. (He loves that whole 80's goth look.)
3. Vampires cannot go out into the sun.
This one is true. But what isn't known is that this intolerance to sunlight is actually because we cannot process vitamin D. It has nothing to do with dark vs. light, good vs. evil. It's an allergic reaction. Vampires are nerd s with allergies. It's true.
4. Vampires cannot eat food.
Oh, we can eat. We just can't process the food. Which means we have to get rid of it by other methods. And trust me, it ain't pretty. Can anyone say, eating disorder.
5. Vampires can turn into bats.
This one is true, and frankly just weird. Bats? Yeah, that's the best way to travel.
Do any of you have questions you'd like to ask about the whole vampire mythos? Ask away. I'd love to tell you the truth about our kind. Go ahead, hit me!
~ The Impalers